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Jan. 13th, 2011 01:06 pmI have just finished Pierre Pevel's The Cardinal's Blades. And I will admit that half the reason I bought it is because the cover is pretty. Also because it seemed trashy and hilarious. I was in fact underestimating the trashiness. Also the bad prose. Maybe it’s the translator to blame, but “Long and high-ceilinged, the room was lined with elegantly gilded and bound books which shone with a russet gleam in the half-light of the candle flames” is completely awful.
FURTHER: Agnès de Vaudreuil (which, admittedly, is a pretty awesome name) a. sleeps around to compensate for some Tragic and Mysterious Event, which we never get to find out about, and b. wears a red leather corset and has a special sword made just for her. Also “emerald green eyes, which burned with a cold flame” seriously. Well, at least she’s not half dragon too, although I think she may be a werewolf. (she is not.)
“Remaining by the door, he again avoided meeting the young man’s gaze as though something dangerous and troubling emanated from him, his elegance and angelic beauty nothing but a façade disguising a poisonous soul.” REALLY.
And now there’s a guy fighting a duel against four people with two swords. I cannot take this remotely seriously.
THERE IS A BAD GUY NAMED MALENCONTRE cracks and shards, this is ridiculous
I am not sure that a code consisting of Latin words and Greek grammar would be that hard to crack. The grammars are much the same; it’s a question of form. Does he mean that when you conjugate verbs, you’d use Greek endings? Like amomai or something? Because that is just terrible.
I am actually not sure on this point: it sounds like something that might be historical, but thinking about it from the point of view of knowing both Latin and Greek, I really don't think it would work. At best, you'd disguise the tense, and that doesn't sound all that effective. (enemies trying to figure it out: oh no, I don't know whether this is subjunctive or some horrible attempt at Latin optative! Surely this will COMPLETELY HINDER my attempts to foil your plan.) this would work even less well with nouns: OH NO the accusative ends in -an instead of -am? THIS IS A DISASTER.
I am also not sure that an ivory sword would work, even though it’s magic ivory. Seriously. Magic ivory from a dragon's tooth.
“Sometimes, throwing yourself into the lion’s jaws was the only means of finding its den.” I don’t know if that sentence would work better for me if I had been swept along by the prose up to now; I doubt it. No matter what the style, the sentence would stand out like a single perfect gem of melodrama.
And then the end got kind of awesome in a totally ridiculous way. Rescue from a burning castle on wyvern-back! Unexpected people are reporting to the bad guys!
Thus: if you don't mind some truly atrocious prose, the cover promises The Three Musketeers - with Dragons! and it delivers. Pretty much everyone is ridiculously overpowered and can shoot straight with 17th century weapons, though.
FURTHER: Agnès de Vaudreuil (which, admittedly, is a pretty awesome name) a. sleeps around to compensate for some Tragic and Mysterious Event, which we never get to find out about, and b. wears a red leather corset and has a special sword made just for her. Also “emerald green eyes, which burned with a cold flame” seriously. Well, at least she’s not half dragon too, although I think she may be a werewolf. (she is not.)
“Remaining by the door, he again avoided meeting the young man’s gaze as though something dangerous and troubling emanated from him, his elegance and angelic beauty nothing but a façade disguising a poisonous soul.” REALLY.
And now there’s a guy fighting a duel against four people with two swords. I cannot take this remotely seriously.
THERE IS A BAD GUY NAMED MALENCONTRE cracks and shards, this is ridiculous
I am not sure that a code consisting of Latin words and Greek grammar would be that hard to crack. The grammars are much the same; it’s a question of form. Does he mean that when you conjugate verbs, you’d use Greek endings? Like amomai or something? Because that is just terrible.
I am actually not sure on this point: it sounds like something that might be historical, but thinking about it from the point of view of knowing both Latin and Greek, I really don't think it would work. At best, you'd disguise the tense, and that doesn't sound all that effective. (enemies trying to figure it out: oh no, I don't know whether this is subjunctive or some horrible attempt at Latin optative! Surely this will COMPLETELY HINDER my attempts to foil your plan.) this would work even less well with nouns: OH NO the accusative ends in -an instead of -am? THIS IS A DISASTER.
I am also not sure that an ivory sword would work, even though it’s magic ivory. Seriously. Magic ivory from a dragon's tooth.
“Sometimes, throwing yourself into the lion’s jaws was the only means of finding its den.” I don’t know if that sentence would work better for me if I had been swept along by the prose up to now; I doubt it. No matter what the style, the sentence would stand out like a single perfect gem of melodrama.
And then the end got kind of awesome in a totally ridiculous way. Rescue from a burning castle on wyvern-back! Unexpected people are reporting to the bad guys!
Thus: if you don't mind some truly atrocious prose, the cover promises The Three Musketeers - with Dragons! and it delivers. Pretty much everyone is ridiculously overpowered and can shoot straight with 17th century weapons, though.
