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I've finally managed to delete everything I'd set up to automatically crosspost from tumblr from 2016-2017, mostly for aesthetic reasons -- I kind of like the seven-year gap in posts, because it's a Metaphor for something, and I hate the links that show up in the crossposts, and tumblr does feel much more ephemeral, so I'm more willing to have the dumb complaints there. En tout cas, it was nice to look back at who I was, and to see continuity and change.
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There is very little new to say about online self-presentation, but there's nothing new under the sun either, so whatever. I'm thinking about my tone specifically -- I try, at my best, for lyrical breezy: long, loosely connected sentences with, hopefully, a light humor amid the complaints, that can bloom into bigger things. Each post is a Journey from wherever I started to wherever the grammar of the sentence and the process of writing took me. This post probably doesn't exactly have a Point, but it is interesting to see how this style and tone have evolved over the years -- 2017 is definitely almost but not quite there; and I definitely fall out of the bouncy complaints into real ones when I'm miserable, and the style itself is much too self-pitying, self-aggrandizing, and melodramatic. The resolution is, therefore, to stay bouncy even when doing that self-pity.
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the other problem with Dreamwidth is that you can't like posts -- it is comforting to get a like on a sad tumblr post, and it's an easy way of getting that feeling of solidarity, and I hardly expect people to comment on a Dreamwidth post, even if it's just with a heart emoji or a <3, because it is more work.
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The real problem with dreamwidth, as it was with livejournal, though, is that it feels less conducive to dumb off-the-cuff posts -- the fault may very well be in me, but I very much feel that I need to have something to Say on these sites, despite the fact that they're not as formal as, say, Wordpress. Even this post feels like it needs to be more substantial.

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Theodora Elucubrare

December 2018

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